The Thought of Being Happy
by JellyTheBean321
Summary: Hoody has developed feelings for his masked proxy partner, he's thought non stop about the day Masky would realize this as well. But Masky brutally refuses to accept the truth. What will happen when a third is added onto this romance disaster? Eyeless Jack has had his eyes on Hoody for a while now. What is bound to happen in this love triangle of hurt, violence, and truth?
1. Love is Blind, and so is Hoody

A/N: This is a Masky X Hoody fanfiction, boy X boy, yaoi, slash, if you don't like, don't read, I can't stress that enough. Anyway, to the readers who enjoy the same couple as I do, thank you for considering my Moody fanfiction, please tell me what you think and what I can improve on to make your reading experience more enjoyable. And just a small note before you begin reading, I believe that Hoody is Brian, I won't state my reasons because I know that some people might deny it. I also think that Hoody doesn't have very good social skills, so if you find him talking strangely throughout the story, just know that he is meant to speak like that. Anyways, thank you for reading, and I hope that you enjoy!

"Love is Blind, and so is Hoody"

The harsh wind whistled and whirled as it raged through the treetops of the thick dark forest below it. It whipped across the sky, leaving trails of dust and leaves in its wake. It looped and curled around the large branches, using its mighty force to overpower them, causing them to tremble. It roared and hacked violently, making sure that its cries could be heard clearly through the dense clump of trees. The blackened sky cracked with thunder, light flashing momentarily in the darkness of the evening.

"We must hurry, Masky. The storm is getting worse, and I fear that the Operator will be angry at us if we are late or do not succeed at our task." the hushed tone was barely audible due to all of the commotion.

The speakers' masked partner nodded, retracting his pocket knife and digging the sharp end into the tree bark closest to him. He carved a crooked and jagged circle at the base of the tree, and then shakily dragged the blade across the shape twice, crossing it out. He smiled at his handy work before looking at his partner's progress.  
He gawked at Hoody's work. He had marked at least four trees in the time that it took him to do one. Hoody was a fast and stealthy proxy, without him Masky would have surely fallen under the ranks years ago.  
Hoody chuckled before pulling a clipboard from his tote-bag, checking one box off on their to-do list.

"Okay, now let us run home, I am sure that the Operator and the others are already back, they are probably waiting for us there." Hoody sighed and stuffed the clipboard back into his bag.  
"Are you sure? Shouldn't we mark more trees?" Masky questioned.  
Hoody shrugged, "We will come back later, when the sky is clearer. Okay?" Hoody patted Masky's shoulder and tugged at his sleeve. Masky grinned as he grabbed a hold of Hoody's hand, squeezing it once before being led down the damp, dark, and muddy trail in which they came.

Hoody tried to help Masky along the way as much as he could, stopping underneath large trees, checking his breathing every few minutes, etcetera.

But at some point, the strain on Masky's weak immune system became too much, and he collapsed, coughing and hacking out of exhaustion and the harsh cold.

Hoody looked around, looking for any type of long-term resting stops.

"Hey Masky," Hoody whispered softly, kneeling down to Masky's level and placing a gloved hand on his shoulder, "If I am correct, the abandoned Hospital should not be too far off from here, I believe that if we are to leave right now, then we will be able to make it before sundown and rest there until you are able to walk again."  
Masky could only wheeze in response, nodding his head slowly up and down before letting Hoody lift him up.

His hooded partner was careful to make sure that Masky was as comfortable as he could be before walking.

He pressed his partners shaking body against his, gripping his waist as he dragged him through the thick brush.

"Okay, Masky, we are here. You may rest now." Hoody dragged the tired and worn out proxy into the deserted hospital, watching as his poor masked partner fell to the floor in a heap and threw another coughing fit. Hoody fell down beside him and placed his head on his lap. He thought that stroking his back would help his hacking subside.  
Although he had a hard time expressing it, Hoody was actually quite fond of his partner. He was strong, yet frail at the same time. He was stubborn when it came to himself and his well being, but when it came to others, he was sensitive and caring.  
Hoody had to be aware of his surroundings at all times. It was required of him as a proxy. But somehow, when it came to Masky, his brain couldn't function properly. His heart sped up, his hands twitched beside him, and he couldn't focus on anything but Masky.

It was a strange array of feelings, ones that he couldn't just push away and ignore, he wanted to feel those emotions every day, and he hoped that Masky would want the same.

He had tried expressing his joy around the masked proxy many times, but his attempts usually resulted in failure.

He had once tried kissing him. It hadn't seemed like such a big deal, it was only a small peck on the cheek after all. But Masky had thought otherwise. He had shoved him away, wiping his cheek on his sleeve in disgust and cursing Hoody's name. His real name.

"The fuck, Brian?!"

Hoody had backed away, shocked and confused as to why Masky reacted the way that he did. He had seen other couples express their love to each other in that way in the forest before, the way that they caressed each other's hair lovingly, the way they shared food items, the way that they nibbled on each other's ears in the most playful of ways. Hoody wanted that, Hoody wanted to relish in those small touches that meant everything to the person who caused them, Hoody wanted to cuddle, Hoody wanted to toy with someone's limbs, Hoody wanted to be kissed, Hoody wanted to be loved – but not just by anyone, by Masky.

He just seemed so perfect. There was no other way to explain it, he was just perfect. From the first day that the Operator brought him in, he could just sense something amazing within him.

Hoody didn't really like to talk to any other proxies at home that much, but Masky was…different. He seemed to enjoy his company very much.  
But after the kissing incident in the forest, Masky had talked about boundaries the whole way home. But that didn't stop Hoody.

Hoody had heard a phrase before, it was something that he had overheard the Operators younger brother say many times, "love is blind."  
It seemed rather absurd, if love is blind then what is the joy in it? Love is one of the greatest of feelings, why would it be a burden? Why would it be blind? Perhaps it blinded other people? But how?

A slight tug on his jacket was enough to bring him back from his momentary haze. He looked down at the masked proxy on his lap. He looked so weak and helpless. He tussled his hair and helped him sit up.

"You are allowed to lean on me if you feel the need to." Hoody wrapped an arm around Masky, pulling him close to him.

He felt a bit alarmed as his arm was shoved away, "N-No thanks, I just need to breathe..."

Masky seemed a bit uncomfortable, his wheezing had gotten worse, and he was sweating profusely.

"Masky..." Hoody hesitantly reached out to touch the proxy, but resisted the urge as he let his arm fall limply to his side, "Are you sure that you require no assistance from me? Surely there must be something I can offer to make you more comfortable." Hoody reached out again and gripped Masky's shoulder, this time the proxy didn't shove him away.

Masky shrugged, looking down, he really didn't like being a burden, "Well..." Masky bit his bottom lip, "I don't know…just don't worry about me."

Hoody rolled his eyes underneath his façade. Masky could be so stubborn when it came to his own health.

"Lean back." he commanded, pointing to the wall behind his partner.

Masky was unsure for a moment, but he did what he was told without question. He scooted back on his rump and pressed his back to the wall for support. He looked up at the hooded proxy standing over him, confused and a little scared.

Hoody walked over to him and sat down on his lap, facing him. He avoided his partner's curious eyes as he leaned forward and placed a hand on his chest.  
"What are you – " Hoody shushed him.

He sat there, feeling the quickening thumps of Masky's heart, which sped up with each passing second.

Thump, thump, thump, thump, thump thump, thump, thump thump thump thump thump thump thump thumpthumpthumpthump –

"You have to calm down." Hoody removed his gloves from his hands and threw them to the side. He then placed his thumbs on Masky's shoulders and began rubbing in a circular motion.

Masky watched intently as he did this, he tried to control his breathing but it was no use, his breath was skyrocketing out of control, and he didn't want Hoody to know that.  
Hoody moved his hands to his collarbone, then to his chest, massaging his sides and moving to his shoulders again. As he repeated the process, he could feel Masky melt beneath his palms.

The tension on Masky's neck had gone, and so had the pressure in his chest.

as much as it upset Hoody to see Masky's pained expressions he stopped, they had to go home. Maybe if Masky allowed him, he could continue later.  
"Sorry, Masky, but we must go home. You understand how angry the Operator gets." Hoody got up and helped Masky to his feet.

Masky nodded in agreement as he grunted, he knew that he couldn't argue with Hoody, or the Operator.

On the way back home Masky didn't speak, there was just an awkward silence as the two talked side by side.

Hoody had had enough. He suddenly stopped and turned to face his startled partner  
He walked closer to him, placing and hand on his shoulder, rubbing was something that had to be said.

"Masky…if you are ever in need of assistance, please do not hesitate to ask, you know I am here for you, right? If I wasn't there for you when you needed it, then what kind of partner would I be? So do not be so stubborn, don't be afraid to admit that you need help, I will not think less of you for it. I am more than happy to take care of you, I just want you to know that."

Hoody turned his body and let his gloved hand gently slide away from Masky's shoulder, instead clutching his hand.

He waited for Masky's little nod of understanding before continuing along the trail.  
He didn't want Masky to feel hurt, or feel upset, or feel uneasy, he wanted him to feel happy and safe.

Masky was often insecure which was why he didn't want to seem vulnerable in front others. But being that he was often ill, he had no choice but to swallow his pride every once in a while to admit that he need assistance.

Of course Hoody was more than happy to help the masked proxy however he could. After all, he loved him. Though, Hoody didn't fully understand the significance of that word yet.

But, you know what they say, love is blind…and apparently so is Hoody.


	2. Waterworks

A/N: I was delighted to see a couple of comments on chapter one, I'm really glad you like this story. ^^ I'm sorry for not updating soon enough, I was sort of busy. But anyways, I hope you like chapter two, chapter three is on it's way, I'll post it tomorrow, and these chapter's are actually pre-written, I just take a really long time to edit and update, I'm really sorry about that...I'll get to posting the next few chapters soon! Bye! :o)

"Waterworks"

By the time that Masky and Hoody had reached their home, it was already dark, and most of the other proxy's had already gone to bed.

Hoody carefully peaked inside of their shared bedroom and looked around. When he saw that it was clear, he sighed and motioned for Masky to step inside, slamming the door behind them and sliding down.

He looked so tired and worn out after such a long way, Masky felt kind of bad for him.  
"Hoody? You alright?" he walked next to his partner and caressed his shoulder with the same gentleness and sensitivity that he had showed him earlier.

Hoody sighed at the immediate contact and fell against Masky's leg in one swift motion.  
Despite the obvious discomfort Masky was in, he stayed put and let Hoody rest. After all, Hoody deserved a reward for dragging him all the way across the forest and back home with no rest.

Hoody was a hard worker. He barely ate and hardly got any sleep, yet he still managed to do his daily duty and find the time to hang out with Masky. It was kind of sad really. All he really wanted was to pursuit happiness, but his happiness was Masky, and he could only have fun with Masky, therefore he couldn't leave his side.

It was a shame that his masked partner could never see the obvious signs of his feelings for him.

Hoody couldn't wait until Masky finally realized how he felt, realized he felt the same way, and kissed him on the lips.

Perhaps Masky would let him sleep on his bed!

Hoody inwardly gasped and squealed against Masky's leg, purring slightly.

Hm…what else would Masky let him do if they became intimate partners? Would he let him feed him food? Would he let him give him more massages? Would he let him touch his hair? The thought of touching such luxuriously silky hair made Hoody tremble. Would he be permitted to sing to him? Would he be able to shower with him? Would they hold hands? Would they exchange clothing?

In the park, Hoody had seen couples share gloves. They always looked so happy.  
Just the mere thought of him and Masky feeling that happy and basking in each other's presence made him feel so lightheaded and giddy, he couldn't help but smile.

Masky was a pretty down-to-earth guy, so he never really cared much for fantasies, but just once, Hoody wanted to be the one to serenade him into a blissful sleep, he wanted to run his fingers through the tuft of hair that covered his face and push it away so that he could see his beautiful eyes, he wanted to hug him, he wanted to kiss him, he wanted to swoon him, he wanted to hold hands, and he wanted to sleep in the same bed as him – but Masky would never allow that…if he had reacted so badly to kiss on the cheek, he would never agree to a kiss on the lips.

Hoody's smile faded as his face heated up in embarrassment.

He was embarrassed because he had actually fooled himself into thinking that Masky would ever return his feelings. Hoody thought it ridiculous that he could let emotions get the best of him so quickly. He was a proxy, he was trained to be the best of the best, a fierce killing machine with only the urge to kill. And now he was crying…  
Wait…he was crying…

A surge of shock ran through him as he tried to stop but it was far too late to go back. Tears were already streaming down his face, causing his velvet cheeks to glisten as he reached under his persona to wipe them away.

Alarmed, Masky knelt down to his partner's level. He removed Hoody's hands from his eyes as he examined them.

"H-Hoody…are you alright? Why are you crying? Are you hurt? Did you pull a muscle? What's wrong?" Masky used his sleeve to dab away the tears that were slowly starting to build up in Hoody's eyes.

Hoody's vision blurred, yet he could still feel Masky's hot breath just inches away from his mouth as he backed away. How desperately he wanted him, but how desperately he wanted to escape his grasp and deny the truth – Masky didn't love him and he never would.  
He violently jerked away and scrambled to get up, pressing himself up firmly against the wall and sliding away from a now confused and stunned Masky.

"H-Hoody, what's wrong –"

Before Masky was given the chance to finish his sentence, Hoody stumbled back and fell onto his bed, hastily repeating, "N-No, nothing, I am fine, everything is fine, I-I just need to get some rest, I'm just a bit tired…"

Masky didn't look convinced, "But you were just cryi –"

"N-No! I-I…" Hoody clenched his fists, unable to think of a proper excuse as he left the room.

"Hoody, I –"

Masky was cut off again as Hoody slammed the door shut behind him. He ran down the corridor and dashed down the stairs. There was one other proxy in this building that he talked to, he knew he could always turn to him when Masky wasn't there, or when Masky didn't feel like talking to him – Eyeless Jack.

As soon as he reached his room, he sighed in relief. Would Jack be awake? Would he even let Hoody sleep in his room? Jack was the only one without a roommate, there was an uneven number of proxies in the building, and Jack didn't really talk to anyone that much. He really only talked with Hoody and Seed Eater.

Hoody found himself knocking on Jack's door, clutching a pillow tightly to his chest and still sniffling.

He heard some shuffling noises inside of the room and a slight creaking noise indicating that someone was walking towards the door. There was a slight pause before the unmistakable clicks of chains was heard.

As the door swung open, Jack peeked outside, when he spotted Hoody, he ran towards him and tackled him to the ground in a massive hug.

"Hoody!" he squeaked in delight, still hugging him.

"Hello there, friend." Hoody grinned.

Jack chuckled as he got up, helping Hoody to his feet as well. He walked him into his room and sat him down on the nearest bed.

He ran over to the door and shut it, then without hesitation, he bolted back to Hoody for another large hug before finding his place next to him.

"So what's up?" asked Jack as he nuzzled into Hoody's side.

Hoody giggled at Jack's silliness, he was so reserved and serious in public, yet when it came to hanging out he became hyper and sentimental.

Hoody patted Jack's head as he sighed, "I uh – do not know how to explain what happened…can I just sleep here for tonight?"

Jack beamed, "Of course! You should know that you're welcome here any….are you crying?"  
Eyeless cursed himself for not noticing sooner. He lifted himself off of Hoody's form and let him rest his head on his shoulder for support. He looked awfully tired.

Hoody remained silent as he rested his head against Jack and clung onto his arm fiercely.  
Jack's face suddenly hardened. A dark aura filled the room, Hoody could feel it.

Indifference and ruthless hatred crept along every crack and crevice there was. It seemed to pour out and spread like flames as Hoody inched away from him.

"…Did Masky do something to you?"

"…"

"Hoody…"

Jack had known about Hoody's little crush for years, and he wasn't particularly fond of his choice.

"Hoody," he repeated, "Tell me. Did Masky do something to you?" even though his tone was meant to be strict and firm his voice trembled.

Hoody couldn't contain the tears that gathered in his eyes as he shrugged. He wasn't sure what to say. Masky hadn't done anything to him.

"Answer me properly dammit, just what the hell did he do to you?" Jack was beginning to shout, which didn't comfort Hoody at all, in fact it only made him more upset as he hugged himself.

Jack seized up, he hated seeing Hoody like this.

He sighed and slinked closer to him. He pressed himself against him until he was practically able to drink in his miserable aura – Hoody looked cute when he was sad.

Jack shook this thought from his mind as he concentrated on calming Hoody. He carefully wrapped an arm around his friend and pulled him into an embrace.

Hoody shook and sobbed as he settled into the others warm body, it almost reminded him of how he wanted to be with Masky, but it just wasn't the same.

"Look, I'm sorry, I just get a little angry when Masky makes you upset, or when anyone upsets for that manner. I'm just really frustrated and it's not your fault, I shouldn't be yelling at you…" Jack murmured as he rubbed Hoody's back soothingly.

Hoody stayed quiet for a few seconds before nodding in understanding.

They sat for a long while, contemplating on whether or not to move. Hoody began to get a little uncomfortable as he squirmed in place, making little whining noises as he silently begged to be released. He was exhausted from such a long night.

Jack looked at the clock, 1:42 am. It was getting really late.

He sighed as he let go and motioned for Hoody to get off the bed so that he could fix it. Hoody obeyed and moved to Jacks bed, waiting patiently for him to tidy up.

Eyeless replaced the old worn out bed sheets with fresh new ones that he had kept for just the occasion. He fluffed up the pillows and spread out some large blankets with ridiculous patterns on them: fluffy clouds, pink stripes, little kittens tossing a ball of yarn around – no doubt he had gotten these from Pinkamena.

Hoody stifled back a laugh.

Then Jack brought out something that caught Hoody off guard – a small worn out teddy bear without any eyes – how fitting, he almost chuckled at the irony. He remained quiet though, he didn't want to seem rude.

Hoody tilted his head to the side in a questioning manor.

Jack placed the stuffed doll in his hands as he smiled underneath his mask, "This is my bear, he doesn't have a name though. I found him in a burnt building on one of my missions. I like him because he's kind of in the same situation as I am." He shrugged, "So I figured you might need him for comfort, after all he always comforts me when I'm sad." He patted Hoody's back as he got up to turn off the lights.

Hoody blinked as he looked down at the small stuffed bear in his lap. He examined it closely, flipping it over and inspecting its condition as he rubbed its ears, poked it, and even sniffed it.

He smiled a bit. He was glad to have a friend like Jack to hang out with, he made him feel better and always made sure that he was happy.

"Thank you." He mumbled. He felt too tired to say anything else as he yawned.

"You wanna sleep in my bed with me? Or if you want you can use my bed and I can use the guest bed, what do you think?" Jack insisted.

Hoody shrugged, "It's quite alright, I'm fine with sleeping on the guest bed, I'd feel a bit more comfortable anyways." He smiled, squeezing the unnamed teddy bear to his chest.  
Jack sighed, "Alright…but just know that we can switch beds any time, I wouldn't mind at all."  
Hoody had barely heard the last part of sentence, but nodded softly anyways.  
Not a few seconds later he collapsed onto the bed behind him, still embracing the small stuffed bear as he fell into a tranquil and serene sleep.

The next day came fairly quickly. Hoody always woke up and prepared breakfast early in the morning. In fact he woke earlier than most of the other proxy's. He wanted to stay clear of any of them during the day as much as he could.

But today was quite the contrary as much as he hated to admit it.

Hoody had woken up later than usual. By the time he was up it was nearly noon. He paid no mind to this, as his body was still sore and numb from the stress caused the day before.  
All he did – or rather all he could do – was lay down and concentrate on the ceiling above him.

There was no way in hell that he was going downstairs after all of the commotion that he had caused yesterday.

He didn't care to see Masky, he hadn't even made up a proper excuse yet as to why he had been crying.

'Oh, sorry for running out without a word last night, Masky, I was just thinking about how you would never love me in this lifetime, and how you would never kiss me on the lips. How about I make you some breakfast, huh?'

Hoody scoffed at the idea of saying such an absurdity.

The thought of food made his stomach growl with anticipation. He was starving. They usually had some food left over, and even though it wouldn't be fresh, it was still something. Maybe Jack could get some of it for him, he would understand, right?

It was only then that he had noticed that Jack was gone. Damn.

He would have to get it himself.

Hoody grunted as he lazily slid off of the bed and jumped onto the floor. He put on his trademark hood and a fresh pair of jeans as he headed out the door and into the hallway.  
He kept his head down, trying to avoid contact with anyone or anything that might try talking to him. He stuffed his hands in his pockets as he trudged through the halls, back slouched and bags under his weary eyes.

He clung onto the wall besides him for support as he walked along the seemingly endless corridor that appeared to stretch out for miles and miles ahead.

In his lightheaded and unsteady state, he could barely see where he was going when –

"EEP!"

A flash of bright pinks and yellows passed by Hoody and The sudden surge of shock that ran through him brought him back to life in an instant as he pushed whatever was on him off.  
He looked up to see that it was none other than Pinkamena – or as she liked to be called, Cupcake.

"Oh my gosh, I'm soooo super-duper upper sorry that I knocked you over! Was it my fault or your fault? Hm…I guess we both weren't looking where we were going – oopsies!" she giggled as she helped Hoody up off the ground.

Hoody dusted himself off as he sighed, "Hello, Cupcake." He really wasn't in the right mood to converse with her.

"OH MY GOSH! I totally forgot to say hello! How rude!" the pink-haired girl pouted, was she yelling at herself?

"OOOOH, Hoody! I have something real important that I have to tell you! Masky's been lookin' all over for you! He's been asking about you all morning long! He's going to be so thrilled to know that I found you!" Pinkie beamed as she bounced up and down.

Hoody stiifened, "M-Masky? He…He is searching for me?"

Cupcake nodded, "Mhm. he's been looking for you almost all day! Poor guy, he looked exhausted." She seemed a bit calmer now as she stood there grinning.  
Hoody gulped, "What do you mean exhausted? Did he look sick?" he had remembered Masky's coughing fit yesterday.

Before Pinkamena could even open her mouth to give him a response –

"Hoody?"

The both of them turned around to see a worn out looking Masky lumbering down the hall way, clutching his stomach, and using the wall for support.

"OH!" Pinkie gasped, "He's here! Isn't that the funniest thing, Hoody? You should go help him!" she gently pushed Hoody in the way of his ill partner.

Masky gasped in pain as he collapsed on the floor, clutching his side as he hacked and coughed violently.

Hoody quickly rushed to his aid.

He didn't want to see him. It brought an undesirable pain to his chest, and it hurt so bad to be around him, but he was hurt! And it all probably due to him.

Hoody held his partner and cradled his head softly on his chest. He smoothed his messy bed hair and tried desperately not to cry as Masky pulled him into a hug.

"H-Hoody." His voice was soft yet raspy.

"Yes, Masky?" Hoody clutched onto his weak partner, trying to keep him in an upright position as he rubbed his back in circles.

"Where the hell were you?" his warm breath tickled Hoody's neck as he spoke softly.  
"…" he didn't know how to respond. He could say that he was at Jack's last night, but then he'd ask why…then how would he respond to that?

"We must get you back to the room."

Masky stopped him, "No. Answer me. Where the hell were you?" Masky sounded more sad than angry at this point.

Hoody only stood there.

Pinkamena watched, suddenly surprised and very worried.

"…Hoody…please answer me." Masky's red puffy eyes were enough to let Hoody know that Masky hadn't slept. It was probably due to the fact that he probably had a fever as well.

He couldn't stand to see him like this.

"…I-I went to sleep in Jack's room."

Pinkamena blinked, she could feel the tension rising as she shivered.

"Why?" Masky sounded at the verge of crying.

"Masky, you are going to cause a scene out here. You are sick, you have a fever, you have not slept, we will take you back to our room and I will tell you there.

Masky didn't care, "No! I want an answer now Hoody! Why the hell were you at Jacks?"

Normally, Masky wouldn't be this touchy-feely, and he would've probably been more reasonable if he weren't in this ridiculously feeble state.

Hoody sighed, "It is not a big deal! I-I-I thought that perhaps you needed some space last night since you seemed ill and –"

"No! You're fucking lying! You left crying! Why? Answer me you little shit!" Masky pulled Hoody down and threw him to the side in fit of anger.

Hoody had had enough…


End file.
